Aging in the 21st Century

The current view of old age in our youth oriented, market driven society promises little more than disease, disability and death. This view is summarily reinforced by those industries that exploit (promote and normalize) the vulnerabilities of aging from which they so greatly profit. Such widespread influence works to ensure that most of us will never think to question the negative images of old age that have become so acceptable in our society. Despite serious evidence to the contrary, these images are so enculturated, so embedded in our subconscious, we tend to accept them as valid.

Think about it: You survive the trials of childhood and adolescence, travel through decades of struggle and learning; family, career, relationships, puzzling paradoxes, life changing decisions - hard won experience becomes knowledge, knowledge becomes wisdom; and then, you get sick and die. Really? Is there no other destination for a lifetime of learning?

Late in the last century a developmental psychologist by the name of Paul Baltes made this prophetic statement: “One of the great challenges of the 21st century will be to complete the architecture of the human life course.” What do you suppose he meant by that? Did he believe we should add on an edifice that doesn’t yet exist: or, was he referring to the potential of an already present stage of life (gero-transcendence) that is not yet clearly understood?

It is remarkable to me that our dominant cultural mind-set, a cult of adulthood, which pushes children to become consumers and distains old people (genarians) for not consuming more; can blind us so completely to the logical fulfillment of our own lives. With such an insane focus on staying forever young, the twilight of life begins to descend by around middle age. Then, successful aging can only be measured in terms of how young one appears to be, or pretends to be. Such an abhorrence of old age (internalized ageism) can only lead to a great deal of needless suffering.

A New Old Age

The truth of becoming an older person today is that one is entering into an oddly mysterious and profoundly misunderstood stage of life, one that is far more complex, and far more rewarding, than common knowledge can comprehend.

Certainly no one can deny the physical or mental problems that can accompany old age, these are evident for all to see; but, neither can anyone deny the natural advantages and opportunities that are also waiting to be explored. As with any stage of life, what you see is largely determined by where you focus. Far less apparent are those older Americans (genarians) who have adjusted to both the gains and losses of aging.

Old age is a mystery and we are all detectives.

To be truly and “successfully” old is to recognize the gift of conscious aging, beginning with an awareness of internalized ageism; the unconscious inheritance of a destructively negative attitude toward one’s own aging self, implanted by a thoughtless society. Reliable research indicates that this negative internalization can gradually become an integral part of one’s identity and actually insure the progression of chronic illness. (1) Similar research also concludes that a positive attitude toward the aging self has a greater influence over actual healthy outcomes than any other factor; including low blood pressure, low cholesterol, a healthy weight or regular exercise. (2)

Conscious aging is not a transcendence of life, but a deepening of life, a time for honest self-reflection that is not limited by the ego demands of youth or middle age. Enculturation has defined you since early childhood, setting values for achievement and standards of conduct at every stage. Until now, your societal road map may have been reasonably clear; self-image and social identity pretty much coinciding. But now, the responsibility for finding out who you “really” are, without those once inhabited masks of conformity, is suddenly and completely up to you.

Some will reach this stage of life and find the prospect of a self outside the security of a cultural prescription too much to consider. Even the certainty of illness and death might be preferable to experiencing the self as unknown, as boundless, as mysterious. The stories we have lived by are familiar and comforting, even if fraught with tragedy; but, they may not be particularly relevant to the new reality that is unfolding within us.

The powerful truth of a new old age lies in one’s ability to occupy questions without grasping for answers. Walking off a map of the known world into unknown territory can be terrifying, but trusting the Universe opens us to a life of unlimited potential. The challenge is to relax into the mystery of becoming a dragon.

© Rabon Delmore Saip 2026

1) Harvard Research - Dr Ellen Langer: Perspectives on Psychological Science, November (2010)

2) Dr. Becca Levy, Yale University, Journal of Personality and Social Psychology, Vol. 83, # 2. (2002) do i remove this image

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